Pleasure and Pain
The Ahhhh and the Ouch of Meditation
What do people experience when they meditate?
-Ahhhhh . . . this relaxation feels delicious.
-Ouch. It is impossible to relax without releasing tension, and tension-release
always hurts, at least a little. You become aware of what you are
tense about as you release
-Ah and Ouch. As tensions are released, there is a pleasure-pain sensation of relief,
like a subtle massage.
-Bzzzzz. The buzz of your nerves vibrating and tingling. It1s a kind
of white noise underneath thought. It changes as you pay attention
to it, and may become melodic.
-Oh No! Suddenly you remember everything you forgot to do or could
have done better. Everything you pushed into the background, saying,
"I think about that later," comes up.
-Whew! Suddenly you settle down, and what a relief.
-Hmmmmm. You find yourself involved in long trains of thought, reflecting on your
life, reviewing actions.
-Hey! You suddenly realize you have been thinking for the past many
minutes, and completely forgot you were meditating.
-Aha. Insights into what is going on in your life, seeing things from a new perspective.
-Grrrr. Anger you felt but did not get to release comes to the surface
to be released and learned from.
-Boo Hoo. Following anger or irritation is often a sense of sorrow.
If you allow the sorrow, it leads you into a deeper melting and deeper
restfulness.
-Ooohh. After tension is released comes a deeper sense of letting
go.
-Zzzzzz. Letting go often leads to a few seconds or minutes of sleep
or near-sleep. You are paying off your sleep debt.
-Ommmm. Here and there are moments of pure repose, being at home in
yourself and quiet.
-Wow. As you acclimate to relaxation, your senses open up and you
feel refreshed.
-Yay! You start looking forward to going out and doing things.
Throughout any meditation you will tend to find yourself shifting from one of these to the other every few seconds. It is common for the tone of experience to change every 15 to 30 seconds. At times the rhythm will be longer, every few minutes, and at times shorter. Sometimes one tone will become familiar and predominant, an undercurrent, that lasts for a few months, a season, and then changes without notice. This is one of the most challenging aspects of meditation, this continual and completely unpredictable flux.
